There have been times when I have thought to myself: “what the hell am I doing?” or “I don’t think I will be able to achieve anything”. The days when I spent hours on a painting or drawing and I just can’t seem to get it right, no matter how much I try. It simply isn’t working. I just start doubting everything. Whether you are an artist or not, whether you are working on your new creation or your new business proposal, we have all faced moments like these.
As an artist, I like to take risks in my work, push and challenge myself, venture into the unknown, attempt things that I am afraid of. And yes some of the works fail and the risks don’t work out.
Believe it or not, with every single creation, every day in the studio, I face some struggle, need to overcome some hurdle. There are times, some moments when I feel disappointed in myself as an artist, feel so unsatisfied with my work. Even when I am all alone, with no one to judge me or watch me. Even when I am completely in the zone and have that sparkling idea. Even when I keep on working and lose track of time completely. Even when no one but me has seen the work yet. I feel I have completely ruined the piece and it is unusable. But do I feel that all the time, energy, effort that I invested in the work is completely worthless? No, not at all! Do I feel like I should have played it safe and stuck to something that I knew would work and not taken the risk? No freaking way! Because this is some of the best time I have spent, I have invested in. Through this process, I have learned and grown and now will have an even better idea for the next time. Through the process, I had a good time and thoroughly enjoyed myself. Learning how to love the process, even when the results don’t turn out right, has brought me the greatest joy and growth in my work. The joy is in the journey.
The journey will not always be easy. Maybe the journey will be full of rocks and thorns and dark voids that you will stumble and fall through in order to reach your destination. Allow yourself to travel on the path of discovery, to unravel confidence to try new things. Because it will be totally worth it in the end. Because that is where your success, your destination lies. And I firmly believe that failures are successes in disguise. Without failure, we won’t make progress and reach the climax in our story. Without failure, we would not be able to take the next step in our journey. So allow yourself to fail and enjoy the process. Just spread your wings, let the wind guide you and fly.